When I wrote my last post, Tardy, it was with the complete intention to begin writing again. Here I am six years later just typing back in. Where did all that time go? Really the better part of a decade of my life. Hmmm. We shall see if the upcoming blogs are the result of some wisdom or clarity somehow obtained through osmosis during such a long absence. Was that time put to good use just living or reflecting upon the deeper meanings of my life? There certainly have been many changes, additions and losses during that time, so perhaps they will all get caught up in the tapestry I hope to continue to weave. We shall see. Time will tell…or maybe not. I might have just leapt over those chapters and they may not resurface to be examined by my further down the road brain and emotions. I am willing to take a chance to see them only in the rear view mirror, rather than try and create them from memory the way they might have been at the time. So here we go: forward!

I do have my oldest son to thank for getting all the back end work done to make this available to me again, as servers had changed and so had all the admin stuff (codes and connections to domains) needed to allow me to get back into and use my site. His hours in chats have made this possible and I am very grateful, because the familiar layout is very comforting to me. It fits me better than my old wardrobe, and it’s gypsy-like motif and the happy colors still make me smile.

He never wastes a connection. The longer I live and the more I observe His divine connections, the more I am convinced He always has something for each of us to learn in any connection He makes between people.

As I recently reviewed many past loves and attractions in a wonderful Beth Moore bible study called Breaking Free, I could see how God had lessons for me in every one of them, although they had only seemed like rejection, abandonment and disaster at the time. Although I also believe He had a lesson for the partner I had been with, or the date or the acquaintance, I could only show up and be accountable to learn the one He had for me. If I chose not to learn the lesson, I could also see where God took me back into a similar situation where I had yet another opportunity to learn it. Choosing not to learn may be called denial, or just plain stupidity, but I often found it was only the second time when I began to recognize a pattern, one that opened my heart to allow God to change it and to see what He wanted me to see. The pain the second time was usually twice as bad as the first, helping me to desire to change before a third opportunity had to arise.

His protection of me, and especially of my heart, has been evident to me for  a very long time, ever since I first turned my life over to Him thirty years ago. He has a vested interest in protecting me and in keeping me safe as I continue to grow and learn about Him and as He continues to lead me where He can use the particular gifts He has given me.  I have come to lean on and appreciate that leading more and more every year. I now jump at the chance to learn the lessons He presents for me, rather than wait for a second or third opportunity. I know that doing that lessens, if not eliminates completely, the pain that I, or those I love, may suffer and prevents the awful cover ups and deception that the enemy thoroughly enjoys manipulating to his advantage.

I may never know if, or how, the Lord has used these same connections in the other person’s life, but that is not important for me to know. God has used it in mine and we will move on to another lesson and that is all that matters.